A day spent with daily soaps.



If you haven't watched a daily soap ever, not even a single episode you are not an Indian or atleast you shouldnt call yourself one. This epidemic started when an egoistic dad who didnt want her daughter to waste money on movies that last on the theatres for a period as long as Kim Kardishian's marriage, thanks to her inclination on casting her 8 pack ab studded brother Tushar Kapoor with acting skills too superior for us feeble humans to understand.

Yes. Ekta Kapoor is to be blamed when us teenagers cant watch non-saas-bahu serials without pissing off our mothers because she misses one of her serials because of you. Ekta Kapoor is to be blamed if your mother forces your dad to switch to Tata Sky just because she has two of her serials on the same time slot and she wishes to record one of them. It was Ekta Kapoor to be blamed when shortly after Kyunki Saas Bi kabhi bahu thi went viral matrimonial ads said : She should be like Tulsi in Kyunki Saas bhi kabhi bahu thi. (which offcourse was in addition to the traditional yet modern, tall yet shorter than the groom, homely yet outgoing, virgin yet whore litany)

If these daily soaps are to be believed women are the only 'meaningful' creation on earth while the men only follow, appearing and disappearing at women's wish, go to office and get killed by vamps. This world is comprised of 50% women who just scheme and machinate evil plans to get the other 50% women (so called good ones) in trouble. These good women are pure saints, always sacrifising for the other members of the family, gets married atleast 5-6 times and remembers never to lose her virginity in the process. The child she is caring for is either adopted or her dead sister's, who very conviniently wished for her to take care of in her last breathe.

But watching a daily soap isnt an easy task, mind you. If you start watching one you have to take the responsibility to pass it on to your next generations because they wont be ending anytime soon.

Love between the girl and the boy is never a prerequisite for their marriage. Either it is to save the girl's dead boyfriend's mom from drifting into never-recoverable depression by marrying the dead boy's brother or it is to save an adopted child from the emptiness of not having a mother. It might even be because the girl loves someone else but that might lead to the parivar's izzat mitti me milna and ghar walo ka muh kaala hona and their naak katna but never because of love.

But its not only saas bahu serials. The silver screen has a wide variety of comedy, drama, suspense though eventually after a month of trying to do something different and not bagging enough TRP's they end up as another saas bahu saga.

Poker faces, Pursed-Lip Discontentment, Simpering Complicity and an evil vixen smile. If you can act these you are qualified to act in any soap.

Though on another note this world will be a better place if our lives became more like these daily soaps. People will be too busy in simpering each other in slow motion to worry about the bigger issues.



27 comments:

  1. First of all I would like to say I loved your post!!!:-D Of course,a versatile and gifted actor like Tushar Kapoor deserves a glowing tribute in any post dedicated to Ekta Kapoor's stellar contributions to the desi soap industry.
    Loved the tongue-in-cheek wit you displayed in this blog.But when I sit back and think about it,I realize one thing.Despite the fact that these soaps dish out the same rotten permutations and combinations of a hackneyed,tried and tested formulae,her shows stil has takers.Which means,she has identified a market she can zero in on.Maybe all that blarng music signalling the happening of some earth-shaking event in these soaps,the balancing of contemporary feminine strength with core traditional values,etc etc does touch a chord somehwere with a sizeable population of our country.It is kinda amazing,when you think about it....:-D

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    1. I absolutely agree with you. Like on every word. It has takers , it has lovers that is why us haters too. But the main fact is what started out as something new, something out of the league has turned into a stereotype thingy.
      It would be better if the feminine protagonist was more outgoing and believed in westernizing than believing in the ideology of adjusting and succumbing to the needs of her family. But then we are no judges. If we had been right and they wrong they wouldn't have been the ones bagging all that money.

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  2. HEHE... thoughtful post :P
    and filled with humor :P
    i would rather hang myself than watching this goddamn soaps..
    DeepaK

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    1. Aah that is not entirely true. Dont tell me you wdont watch one of them once in a while. :P

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  3. This is not a well writren Post, seems to be a desparate attempt to make it funny!

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    1. Anonymous,I think you are being a bit unfair in saying that is not a well-written post.And it definitely isn't a desperate attempt to make things seem funny.It is funny.It made me smile and laugh.:-)And trust me,that's a hard thing to do.

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    2. First. Hey Mr/Miss/Notdecided/ Anonymous, If you were so sure about your comment why hide behind the anon tag? What, bullied in highschool? Cant frame your opinions out loud?

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    3. Anon and rude too? Y U NO, behave yourself first?

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  4. Ekta Kapoor is to be blamed when us teenagers cant watch non-saas-bahu serials without pissing off our mothers.. How true this is.. *tears*

    Very well written, but to be honest even I do watch every soap with my Mom these days.. No otr option left :-(

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    1. Seriously. Me too. From 8.30 to 10. Phewww.
      3rd degree torture cell our room is I tell you.

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  5. Hehehehehe..virgin yet whore!..rofl awesome :D

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  6. Marry a girl for mom's depression and then depress her ever more to get her killed and then bring her back again from the dead.

    I was recently addicted to Sach Ka Samna, finally got over it and TV serials have never been my style. But, I am visiting my mom next month and I think, I may come back with an overdose :D

    ~ Chintan

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    1. Yes. The most weird story lines they have. Btw best of luck for the overdose. ;)

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  7. Hie sweetie ;)
    I watch supernatural like a freak ;) (just got your newsletter :D) Not a soap buff though :D
    No spoilers please, I still sit on the 5th season. And yeah, Sam is under-rated but so so so cute :) The Winchesters :D I actually said it out loud :D

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  8. I haven't watched even a single episode of Kabhi Saas bhi Kabhi Bahu thi. But, seems like it, you have written quite a thesis here. ;)

    An overdose of those episodes was good in a way...bringing out this funny post.
    I found the episodes more stupid than funny or dramatic..

    But, yeah..its ok...I have been asked to sit once in a while with parents to watch soap operas, to which I have caved in..here and there or pretended to watch while doing something else or just retired to my room.. :)

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    1. Plus all of them are so identical. One agonised bahu. One dominating saas.

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  9. Haha. Wow. I love you take on our typically Indian daily-soaps. They are endless and so predictable that now, I see a tragedy as nothing but a parody of a real life incident. But hey. our mothers (and in my case, even grandmothers) love watching these shows. So...the battle between sanity and Tv continues. :P

    I have given you an award on my blog. Come and check it out sometime. :)

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    1. Yeah atleast it gives our mothers something dramatic in their usually monotonous lives.

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  10. Those women stay decked up all the time, and omg! They sleep with their make up on and in their heavy saris! And their hair open. I fail to understand why they are never knotted :P
    All of it, is just HOPELESS! Every bit of it :)

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    1. Maybe its a wig so they prefer them un-knotted. :P

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  11. quite a post in itself.... agreed undoubtedly that it depicts a lot of drama and emotions but somehow it depicts society also although vey faintly connected... and its a poor feeling to see the slow movement or dragging of stories but ya its a good passtime.... or rather one of options to passtime... and even some are so dedicated as if ek bhi episode nahi miss hona chahiye or hai rama ye ya ho gaya usey as if its so real and all stuff...overall a story has its own twists and turns... but sayad tv ki yahi kahaani hai ... yahi parampara hai... kab tak barkarar rahegi pata nahi... nice post and nice expressions... hinglish is really good... keep writing..

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    1. Yes. Our society. But in a very over the top way. But they should make more modern concept shows so as to inspire people living in rural areas. Instead they are pulling then back towards all superstitions and stuff.

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  12. inspite of every thing. You watch them all. Lolz...!!!

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