by N. on Sunday, September 25, 2011
She wiped a tear as she lay down the phone. 'Sorry'. That wasn't what she needed.
She cursed herself, for the millionth time as she saw herself in the mirror, swollen red eyes, and tears.
Tears that won't agree to stop, tears that didn't need a reason to steal her smile these days, tears that came gushing at the slightest provocation.
She remembered her former self. How people would call her cold hearted ,how she had been proud of being one. How it was so easy to smile through the toughest of problems, and how nothing mattered.
And now how a single person changed her entire self. Its as if she doesn't recognize herself anymore. She finds herself morphed into a 'sissy-girl' or that's what she called them before.
The people who were sensitive, for whom love mattered the most, for whom being-cliche-being-cheesy didn't matter as long as the feelings were genuine.
He came barging through the door. 'Hey I donot know what your problem is but I am tired of apologizing'.
She started sobbing again as he began to leave. 'Right now I am in pain. Right now I have nothing to give, but this is the time I need you the most. I just need to feel you around me, holding me, making me feel how important I am for you. You don't need to say anything at all, I just need to feel your arms around me. Please don't go. Please'
And How she still wishes she had said all that aloud that day.