Being a girl is the last thing you would want to be.



Do you want to be girl? Like, Forever?

The answer to this statement being a ‘YES’ is as rare as a good hair day on your first date. Especially if you are an Indian. I have nothing against my country but when it comes to being born as a girl, India would be the last place I would like to be born into.

The only day you might have wanted to be girl would be when you accidently went to an interview without fully buttoning your shirt and your man boobs just quite didn't impress the boss, or when you had to hand over your 'hard-earned' money to your sister on Rakshabandhan.

If you still say yes “I would gladly be a girl” answer me:

Do you want to be ranked on a scale of Nicole Richie to Scarlett Johansson on the basis of your size of your boobs by random roadside people on the street as soon as you leave your house?

Do you want guys to look at your tits instead of your eyes and pinch your ass instead of shaking your hand?

Do you want to be offered a job because somewhere in the back of your boss’s mind he thinks that you might be very good in bed and he has a chance?

Do you want to be called a slut just because you wear revealing clothes?

Do you want to be raped and then hear it was your fault because you were wearing a mini skirt?

Do you want to see your brother attend all night parties but not going yourself because, well you are a girl?

Do you want to be called characterless just because you have slept around with more than one person unlike a guy, who is called a stud?

Do you want to reconsider your option of wearing white according to the weather?

Do you want to be stared at when you walk into a room where people are telling a dirty joke and they awkwardly stop midway at seeing you?

Do you want to wait an hour to find a decent washroom on a road trip?

Do you want to be paid less for an equal amount of work that a male colleague does?

Do you want to buy condoms with the shopkeeper imagining you naked?

Do you want to writhe in pain bleeding every month?

Do you want your parents to fuss over wherever you go, because they think everyone is going to rape you?

Do you want every guy commenting ‘hot’ on your Facebook picture just because it has a slight glimpse of your bra strap?

Yes I thought so too. You don’t have to worry about permissions when leaving the house. You don’t have to worry about any pain or bleeding when losing virginity. You don’t think twice before introducing your girlfriend to your family. You don’t need to act dumb to make a girl notice you. You don’t have to worry about your underwear glimpsing while doing weights in the gym. Unlike a girl, you just have to have sex to have a baby.

You don’t get people lecturing you about problems in future pregnancy if you smoke or drink. The girl’s parents do not assume the fact that you are a Sanjeev Kapoor when you marry. Your name and your parents live with you forever.(or till when you want). You do not have to bear with the pain of hot wax (especially nowhere near your private area.) You do not have to worry about making crotch adjustments in public. And this is a list when we are talking about a girl who is born in a middle class family who have somehow managed to break free of the clutches of ancient practices of not educating the girl child.

Being a girl is very difficult. But its not like we had a choice. The very least that you can do is respect us.






45 comments:

  1. Strong views but right-on-the-point views. I agree that the least we could do is to respect you and change the way how we view you.

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  2. Aah, wouldn't I love a society where a brazilian wax was taboo and so NOT a requirement.

    Being born and brought up in Delhi, I know EXACTLY what ur talking about. If only the blue line bus wasn't the horrendous torture it has turned into stepping out of the house wasnt the ordeal it has come to be.

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  3. I totally Agree with you.

    Anyways I would love to give birth to a GIRL :)

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  4. And all the pain we bear?? Ultimately for whom? Tch Tch. Brilliant post, Nia...it's bang on...Even now I wish sometimes that I were a guy, for the sheer looks I get...that OOOH! She is grown up now! *Why ain't they getting her married!* Touched the strong side of me. *Hugs*

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  5. Even if I had a choice, I would prefer being a girl. We are Awesome!!!!!!!!!!
    Great post

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  6. I sort of agree, we might have all of that to agree about but even if today I was given an option to choose I'm extremely sure I'd want to be a girl! :) Its so much cooler. And the fact that god has given us so many problems to deal with shows that he finds us more capable of dealing with it than the guys. Random thing. LOL.

    :)

    YAAAAY. Loved the post.

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  7. You pointed out things that make a girl's existence a living nightmare of sorts. And going through all of this, we are still on the darker side of one's opinion.

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  8. too good..i was lyk nodding no to all the questions u put across ! :) but then i feel blessed to be a girl for more reasons than one..we are just too damn cute to be true ;)

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  9. TRUE WORDS and this is reality, very very true and FRANKKKKK post :)
    If you ask me, i would like to born as a girl IN INDIA.
    1) Can get free samosa and dinners in my college canteen, where guys would pay for me :)
    2) Just a smile over a teacher will increase my internal marks.
    3) parents will get me all new things and they wont scold.
    4) I will get separate coaches in train and separate seats in bus.
    5) I dont need to study(Very glad) even if i dont have degree, some microsoft guy will marry me and can settle happily in states :)
    6) Police wont stop my bike and ask for license :P :P :P||||

    GOOD POST !
    www.deepakkarthikspeaks.blogspot.com

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  10. @technoflirt : Yes , indeed. A lot has to be changed.

    @shreya: Yes. Blue line buses are one thing but now even metro is a torturous experience even if we have different compartments.

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  11. @chikkie : You are a brave person. If I would have been given a choice I would be a guy any day.

    @MSM : So true, and parents sometimes talking as if the only motive of a girl's life is to get married and have babies.

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  12. @REd and Sonshu : YOu guys are so positive. I wish I was that optimistic.

    And Sonshu the fact that god has given us so many problems to deal with shows that he finds us more capable of dealing with it than the guys. Bang on. Well said.

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  13. @ES: That is the main blasphemy. If we are going through this much pain and sacrifice we should be regarded equal if not higher.

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  14. @Vaibhav : Thank you.

    @maliny : Cute ? Understatement that would be :p

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  15. @Deepak : Commenting and sounding funny is one thing but actually doing is another. I don't think surviving as a girl is that easy.

    1) Guys would only pay for you because somewhere they think that might give them a chance to sneak into your pants.
    2) This indeed is an advantage ;)
    3) Maybe its some certain female you are talking about, because as far as I know and have heard parents dont get us things more than they do to our brothers and neither do they do any partiality in scolding.
    4) That wont stop creepy males to overflow into the women's compartment or stand at the nook and stare inside at you all the time.
    5) True True :D
    6) Why not keep a license instead? :p

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  16. i think u nailed it... yes every woman deserves respect i totally agree with that...

    and let me just tell u that there are guys who do respect girls, u see the one who is out there to rape u, but what abt the one who is out there to protect u as well.. i am not talking abt ur da or ur boyfriend... even if u just gets pinched by a guy, cry out loud and 10 people will come there to rescue u... where in india u might ask!... s in india i will say...

    s parents do have to be a lil more protective around a girl child, but they only do it for ur safety. because there r bastards around who wouldn't think a second before jumping on u seeing like sort of a prize because u came to the party...

    There r always 2 sides of the coin, good and bad... s i agree there r a lor of difficulties with a girl, but i believe thats what makes her stronger... we men are actually weak compared to girls, we need constant support by appraisal and everything, but a woman works her whole life without any expectation... i have deep deep respect for that...

    S for all the pain that u girls go though, u should be respected and boys should have the sense to understand that rather seeing girls as sex objects...

    Great post...

    Take care and keep writing.......

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  17. Yes. I totally agree. A coin has two sides. But still some things do need to change.

    Thanks. :D

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  18. Yeah! Marriage and babies. And when *you* try to talk about marriage..., "You concentrate on your studies!" Sigh. :P But well, nevermind. :D

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  19. being a gal born and brought up in a society like ours has its fair share of problems.Very true.You posted all your points with an efficient sincerity that's really very very admirable.But you know,being a guy has its own problems too.Grass always looks greener on the other side.:-) But yes,your post does make a guy think.You raised some points which I never really thought about before.Kudos to u for that.....

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  20. that's our eternal misery. being an INDIAN girl.
    awesome post!!

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  21. All the points are so so valid...
    But I love being a girl and I expect everyone(male/Female) to respect what we are... At times a woman only fails to understand the other woman's pain...

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  22. You nailed it totally!

    First time on your blog and I loved your writing!

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  23. This is a poem which I had read

    It would have been better if I had born as a girl
    Even if I get old , we will never get bald
    there will be special buses running in the city for us
    You don't have to shave daily
    All the laws will favor us
    We can always be on the cell , the cell will always be active and we don't have to pay for it , because all calls will be incoming calls
    If we attained puberty , everyone will celebrate it as a function !
    Atleast forty of us will propose us
    Marriage , Mehendi , and all the celebrations are for women
    You can give a complaint against your husband
    some idiot will build a Taj mahal for us
    If we play tennis , everyone will notice
    Our Blogs will have a lot of readers
    We can determine who can become a minister

    It would have been better if I had born as a girl

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  24. NIA! HOW DID YOU?!

    OMG, everything was shot to the point! The line up of questions were so true. Despite having to lift all that responsibility and insecurities in our lives, I don't know why are the girls seemed as the weak one's. Just because we have low testosterone? We don't have bulging solid muscles? Come on, I think we deserve a whole lot of respect instead of discrimination.

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  25. @Krishna : I would gladly leave all that stupid-advantages anyday.

    @NIA Exactly. Discrimination. In my view we should be worshipped for all that we do, for all that we leave. But if not that atleast consider us equal.

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  26. Hi...first time on your blog. loved the look and feel of the blog (no pun intended) and your style of writing. But I do not agree with your views totally. Not that I want to be a girl (I am pretty happy being a guy), I think it is also tough being a guy. When most of the males are portraying a bad image on the psyche of girls like you, it is very tough for us to convince you the opposite. Dont make 'being a girl' sound pitiable and you cant get respect by asking. If you deserve it all heads will bow down. BTW RESPECT (and not because of your last line...:P)

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  27. Yes you are right. When most of the guys are stoopid :P and bastards the ones who are genuine and nice find it very hard to get the message across.

    Ok, think about this. Ever thought if you could switch places with your maid? How life would have been. I bet you wouldnt have thought about it because in your sub concious mind you know you would never want to be one.

    Exactly in the same way you would never have thought of being a girl because well it is too stressful and discriminated against.

    Its not that I am asking you to respect us just because we deserve it. I am just making people realize how easy everything is laid out for you guys.

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  28. Awesome post, being a girl is so hard, no matter what we do we get a negative comment from the so called society. If we don't study they think its so easy for us as we can get married and "the end", but who wants to live on someone else's money?? If we work hard and rise up career-wise, they say we are only climbing the ladder because we are women and we can have our way anywhere.
    And walking in public is always a mental torture, there's nothing we can do but just ignore the dirty stares and comments that will come to us at one time or the other. If we stand up for ourselves, they call us b***h or if we try to ignore it, they think they can have their way with us as we can be easily intimidated.
    Thank you for sharing this.

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  29. @Neha : Agree with every word.

    Ignoring is the only weapon we have. Whether be it the stares, the comments or the society.

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  30. It's a fucking chauvinist society.

    But hopefully, "the times they are a changin'...".
    Great post!

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  31. Sometimes, life seems too much to handle. You know that no one likes being called 'lucky' in today world because of their problems, not even for a thing like being a boy n not getting the problems you mentioned. But deep inside your heart, you know it's not that you don't wish to be a girl, you just want to feel better being what you are. And of course, respect is something you are well worthy of, especially because for your creativity and awesome expressing power of your emotions,a man can't create a blog as you do. For whatever the society is, just remember there will always be some few who respects you and other girls, it's only the few of every kind who makes life worth living. There are unsolvable problems to endure in everybody's life. Rest, you know the good points of being a girl or you'll feel them when you are in a better mood, be proud of what you are. :)

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  32. Beautiful post.Left me poignant.
    And WHY DINT I FIND YOU ALL THIS TIME?? Shame on me!!

    Love ur blog, and your writing, and the layout :D Adorable.
    Instant Fav.

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  33. @burzum : It indeed is. But I just wish I was born in the 'changed' times than the changing.

    @GG No I know deep down in my heart that I dont want to be girl. Specially here. In this chauvinist society. The things a girl has to go through are universal, but places and people like in India make it more difficult.

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  34. @OLMM : I cant believe how much Thank you I have said to you in a matter of 24 hours. Sigh.

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  35. then better stay at home..seems people in the past had understood these things pretty well.....men take care of the outside world and women take care of home...looks simple...aint it...a woman can understand another woman but no one can understand a man.......

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  36. Really? And how does staying in the house solve anything?

    And if you are so open about your views and strongly support them. Why is there a need for you to be anonymous.

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  37. Bang on points. I totally second your opinions.

    This was one powerful post!

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  38. Bang on points. I totally second your opinions.

    This was one powerful post!

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  39. Honest Honest Honest :)
    Given a choice between being born as a girl and not being born at all I'd choose the latter.
    Anyday. Anytime.

    PS Supernatural gets better and better with each passing episode :)

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  40. Respect. Lady!

    But think about it, do you really want to be a guy? Seriously? (I am not saying that I do not want to be, but DO YOU?

    Yes, the Indian society has been lead by males, but do YOU for no reason want to be blamed 'Male-chauvinist'? Even if you think that all are same?

    Do you want to be called a 'Pervert' when you tell some girl that she needs to adjust her shirt? Even when your intentions were only good for her?

    I have an endless list of such facts with me but wouldn't share or else I would be taken as if I am trying to contest on 'What is it better to be - a Girl or a Boy'! I am only trying to say is that both the genders have their own share of the Goods and the Bads. Poeple just need to become better, and not 'become of the other gender'.

    Lastly, I personally feel that 'Womenhood' is the best thing that could ever happen to this world. I don't know if you (and the other women) feel the same.

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  41. @Serendipity : I second that.
    @Dhakkanz : Seriously? I dont mind being called Male-chauvinist every second of the day if given a choice between that and being born a girl here.

    Though I believe with the people getting better part. The problem isnt with being a girl or boy. I wouldnt mind being born as a girl in the USA. I say this not because I feel USA is the best country in the world or our country is shite but because I feel they arent gender biased.
    This country/these people need to change. They need to know girls arent the reason rapes happen.

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